@ChiQ'sLife

A dawn to remember

2012-02-10T00:01:00.001+08:00

I was so lazy to blog even though there have been sooooooooo many things happened last few days...

One of my friend is happily engaged... =) So happy for youuuuu..
Semoga Allah Panjangkan Jodoh Kamooo Berdua...

I stayed at pikachu's house for the past 4 days... It was FUN!

Although there was one morning I woke up and cried out of nowhere because I was missing mom so bad.. (SPOILER MUCH SHIQS NI... Nasib baik takde orang nampak... hukhuk... )
Looking at her family made me jealous somehow that I end up on the other side of the road...

But, takpe...
I will make my own one day...
Soon..

kat sawah..........
ada gaya budak kampung x?

hehe....

Melting

2012-02-01T17:32:00.001+08:00

Tronoh is a sun mine!!

It's freaking HOT in this place..
and please... I am getting darker..
with the weight gain.. THE HOTNESS IS NOT HELPING AT ALL!!!
unless you melt my FAT away.... i am NOT happy!

Fast Forward

2012-01-31T00:31:00.001+08:00

Whenever I board a bus, I tend to have this rush of feelings the moment I sit on the not so comfy but kinda okay cushy chair with a total stranger on the next seat who (EVERYTIME) stares at me even after I settled down.

I feel this adrenalin rush with a mix of excitement and some sprinkle of tiredness with a sense of relief that I am heading to my hometown and to familiar and loving faces. Knowing that there will be a loved one already waiting for me 20 minutes before my arrival to the station always create a blanket of security and safeness which will leave me feeling warm throughout the entire journey.

Then the 10 minutes upon arrival, the adrenalin start pumping again.. "I'M HOMEEEE".. The usual Silent scream which flood my heart.. The seconds my feet touch the ground and when the first warm night breeze touches my skin, I get goosebumps....

and when I see his face, standing outside his car as tall as ever.. head held up as high as he could, waiting for me... All those troubles and sickness I felt and I have been complaining to him throughout the 2 months of separation felt nothing.

I only see him.. and every thing felt so warm and beautiful.

How I wish I am running towards him like a kid with hanging bags and my hair waving behind me against the wind.

How I wish to see his arms wide open and his eyes sparkle brightly with that familiar wide smile across his face.

How I wish I am in his tight embrace feeling so loved and missed and appreciated.

How I wish to feel like time has stopped just for us 2 crazies.

How I wish.....

Bloo

2012-01-30T18:47:00.001+08:00

after 1 year and a half,
I finally change my shoes...

comel sangat la pulak.. =P

Shocking

2012-01-30T16:37:00.003+08:00

Freaked myself out with the shocking weight gain~!!!

Mood : Crash Diet

Target : minus ~~five~~ three kgs (for now)

New

2012-01-29T22:31:00.002+08:00

New Semester.

New Chapter.

New Steps.

Same Love.

Turning over a new leaf.

happy dappy

2012-01-25T16:09:00.002+08:00

happy engaged life my dear cuzin...
Semoga jodoh berpanjangan ke anak cucu...

dah cam opera pun ada gak... hikhik...

but u look lovely (tak make up lagi lawa... natural beauty la sis)

ooopps ... hehe... nak menyibuk gak...

Fullstop?

2012-01-03T16:25:00.001+08:00

kesan amik keputusan dalam keadaan marah dan stress.... SANGAT BURUK..

I din chose 10smses a day over my friendship..
I just chose to not want to deal with unwanted pressure during my semester ends...

I'm sorry I hurt your feelings... =(

Footprints

2011-12-31T03:34:00.001+08:00

people are making new year's resolutions and checking the last items in their 2011 checklist by today.. for tomorrow is already 2012. (the most awaiting year of the 21st century) and me.. capturing this very moment of my year 2011.. (rasa cam dalam movie plak... *frozen* and flashback in full speed)

Millions of gratitude towards Allah for giving me strength to walk through the year despite all the nonsense and emotional breakdowns. baru masuk 22 tahun, dah nak masuk tahun baru dah... (I miss you little bratssssssss)

Mohamad Neezam...

I can't find words to tell you how much I appreciate you in my life.

Thank you for all the fights, the hugs, the tears, the memories, the words of love

and

Thank you for taking care of this silly gal and bringing her back on her feet when she can't find support.

you know how much I love you.

and you know how far I would go to keep you in my life.

Friends...

who lend your shoulder when I'm in need of comfort..

who made me laugh when I'm on the verge of breaking down in tears..

who guided me with words of wisdom..

who taught me the value of life...

who walk with me through hardship with smile..

I can't thank you enough for always being there and paint my world bright...

I love you people with all my heart and soul..

To my beloved sister and brother...

I love you both.

Give me a lil bit more time..

I'll bring you both out of the drama hole and we would live happily as how ma always wanted us to..

Take care my sweethearts.

Hugs and Kisses.

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY~!

silence

2011-12-21T21:17:00.000+08:00

Not one single moment of silence pass by without me thinking of you, ma..

Not one.

How I wish I am in a really2 bad dream now..

and when I wake up tomorrow,

You will be there..

Its freaking hard to pretend that I'm fine with everything..

heh

2011-12-18T00:24:00.003+08:00

who do you think you are?

Saint ? BAIK SANGAT?? SUCI??

You have no rights whatsoever to send me a text message after almost a year of silence and
tell me to "buang tabiat buruk"..
sepatah pun tak tanya how I'm doing.. hw's my studies going on... am I ALIVE or DEAD????

Do you realized how other people look at you?
Do you know what they all say to me about you?
Do you know why all your children rebel to you??
HAVE YOU NO IDEA???

We rebel because you suck at doing your job as parent..
You fail as a husband to BOTH of your wives..
You fail as a father..
You fail as a human being~!!!!!!!!!!

You know what? even if we all have "tabiat buruk" we inherit THOSE from YOU...

I can't believe arwah trusted you with all her heart...
you betrayed the trust of so many souls..

Anyway...
Be happy with your life..

Break

2011-12-16T16:51:00.004+08:00

work ..........~~work~~ (snooze) .......................... wake up ........... eat ....................................................... work..
....... bed...................................................................

weekend

Sleeping Disorders

2011-12-16T13:35:00.001+08:00

Okay...
lepas 2,3 komen aku slalu duduk atas katil tengah2 malam macam tak tido...
and
lepas insiden cakap tepon ngan mohamad neezam for 1/2 and hour in the phone around 3 am tapi esoknye aku merajuk sebab aku ingat dia tak call aku inform dia dah balik rumah... padahal aku tak ingat langsung aku cakap tepon) akhirnya malu sendiri lepas tengok received call...

aku pun terima la kenyataan aku ada sleeping disorder...

masalah aku adalah sleepwalking...
buat benda dalam tido tapi tak ingat pape esoknya ...

punca nya sebab stress, insomnia, anxiety and conflicts...
so sesapa yang ada masalah sama ngan aku.. rasa nak confirmkan apa masalah korang,
click la link kat bawah ni..
membantu la jugak..

click here if you have sleepwalking problems...

Decisions

2011-12-16T13:07:00.002+08:00

Its easy to decide..

But its not easy to take the steps..

And I am going nuts fighting my own guts that I think I am having a split personality disorder.,.

One a weenie pussy who can't take her life decision in her own hands... and the other who simply want to get out of all these unwanted drama and start her new life, fresh......

Missing You

2011-12-13T22:15:00.001+08:00

I am

SERIOUSLY,

DEEPLY,

MADLY,

INSANELY,

FREAKING

miss you

:
:
:
:
Mohamad Neezam Bin Rahim..

Freaking Ooot

2011-12-12T20:12:00.002+08:00

Ookays...

so here's the deal...

14th --- Submission of Man Tech Assignment (6 Quests)
--- ECons Test 2

19th --- Submission of Individual Project ( Man Tech) --> 20% progression up to date

20th --- Energy Conversion and Management Test 2

21st --- Vibration Test 2

23rd --- Man Tech Group Presentation (0% progression up to date)

Before Christmas ---- Man Tech Test 2 ( Open Book Test so hopefully it will not strike the balance of my sense)

Thank God I've done all my parts for other projects.. or I am seriously going to slap my face real hard right this moment for being such a lazy pig during weekends.......... AAAAAA.... STUDY LA SHIQS~!!!!

chocolate

2011-12-11T22:17:00.001+08:00

You damn chocolates~!
YOU GET ME DRUNK~!

YOU SO DELICIOUS but i can't have even two bites of you... i get drunk like a drunken drunk monkey...

ooooooooooooooooooooo... im soooo drunk.....

Thousand miles

2011-12-09T19:04:00.001+08:00

Semalam tengah syok2 buat keja skolah, si pika bagi link nih suh baca.... click la kalau rasa nak baca

dah separuh jalan baca tu baru sedar, ooo rupa2 nya macam tu... aku tak penah sedar pun selama ni...

yang peliknya bila dah sangat sayangkan seseorang, semua kelemahan dia kita rasa kita mampu terima seadanya walaupun benda tu kekadang merimaskan.

contohnya;

Over sensitive nak mampos...

tak gentleman langsung...

sangat macam budak kecik kalau dengan kita ... (suma benda kena layan)

tapi kan....

kenapa walaupun otak kita tahu kita boleh hidup sendiri,

hati tak nak lepaskan dia.. ?

aaaaaaaa... couple tercomel di dunia..

aloolooo... tomei nye...

mcm mana pun aku timbang fikir timbang fikir, last last...

I still feel you are the only person I would grow old with..

We'll make it work.

nak macam ni jugak... bole?

miserable

2011-12-07T23:47:00.001+08:00

I give up!

I explained. You did not try to understand.

I explained. You want me to admit that IT IS and ALWAYS be my mistake.

I explained. You still do not want to understand.

I explained.

I explained.

I am tired of explaining.

now I give up.

Rude Much?

2011-12-05T23:53:00.001+08:00

whole class : chit chat chit chat ... chit chat chit chat...

lecturer : HOI~! you wana talk you go talk outside~!
: did ur mum teach you to be rude to me ?
: did your father teach you to be rude to me?
: ladies in hijab acts like atheist~!
: rude~!

say... both parties were rude... but the comments from the lecturer were waaaaaaaay TOO MUCH...

lecturer pun kurang hajar... you expect your students to be nice to you?
btw, did your mum teach you to call people "son of a bitch??"
did your father teach you to call people "son of a bitch"??

SEE, I CAN BE RUDE TOO....

Last Words

2011-12-04T15:12:00.001+08:00

I watched the episode of HIMYM "Last words" and it reminded me of the fact that I can't remember my mom's last words to me...

The only memory left on the last night with her was I fed her grapes and watermelon cuts in very small pieces and she kept smiling towards the ceiling.

and the next morning , she was exhaling her last breath in my arms..

I miss you so much..

Freaking killing me inside out...

Right

2011-12-02T19:11:00.001+08:00

A friend says : Doing the right thing is always hard.

You know the feeling when you know you want to get out but you can't seem to find the door.. OR rather the door is IN FRONT OF you and all you need is to take a step forward but you can't because you keep thinking that if you let the thing you are holding on at that moment go, you will die.

What should I do?
WHAT SHOULD I DO??!!!!

mood : uncertain

Face

2011-11-29T13:40:00.001+08:00

mood: swinging..

Thinking of: Money ... Having a perfect S body..

Miss u, ma...
I need you ~!!
come back for a while please..
I can feel my steps slowing down..
I duwana give up... I wan a HUG~~~~~!!!!!!!!!!!
Ask Mr. God to give me strength..

come back.....................................................................

slides party

2011-11-28T21:23:00.001+08:00

loading ................. 10% ........................................................................... still loading

La la la

2011-11-28T16:26:00.001+08:00

Currently

Listening to : Red f.m

Looking forward to : Eat.

in the Mood of : enjoying the rain pouring outside my window

Have to : Finish my Manufacturing Project Report and Presentation SlideS!

"niac"

2011-11-28T13:39:00.001+08:00

Is it too crazy to put your ultimate faith on someone who never gets anything figured out in their life but always wanted to give the best for you?

some says love.

some says you're stupid.

some says ahh, no comment.

But I say, that is faith. You just believe even if you can't see the road ahead.

mood; uncertain

Tantrum

2011-11-20T21:53:00.001+08:00

oh, I threw a freaking hell of a tantrum today..

I screamed my lung's off to the bus driver who has No fucking respect to other people...

lain kali nak tunjuk kahaq hang kat orang macam aku, hang pikiaq dulu okayh... aku tak dak nak cakap lembut2 kat orang tua taktau respect orang macam hang... boleh blah...

and on a totally different note,
Even if I look all nice and you can easily take advantage on me because I don't tell you off, doesn't mean I'm gona stay like that forever..

My silence has it limit....
Don't test my patience..

oh, ya... and to you who called yourself as my "family member", get the fuck out of my life..
Lepas korang dah hina aku atas bawah,
Hina arwah mak aku,
Tak de rasa bersalah atau malu nak sebar fitnah pasal aku satu dunia walaupun aku darah daging kau,
walaupun aku dah keluar rumah lebih 2 bulan kau tak fikir nak tanya aku hidup ke mati ke...
sekarang kau nak mesej aku dan emo2 plak la??
aku tak ingat family???

again....
don't test my patience...
I rather have no family, than have someone like you in my life...

Gud

2011-11-18T02:58:00.001+08:00

Felt good today.. went jogging.. although throughout most of the journey i was walking and pretending to be tired whenever people pass by.. hehe..

I don't know why you love me so much...

I seriously have no idea..

But it felt so good to be loved by a man like you..

You have changed so much for me..

We are going to be great.. I wana live my whole life with you even though I know we would probably bite each other in a fight everyday.. but we also made up.. and seriously, that's the best part.. :P

Fat

2011-11-17T12:11:00.001+08:00

I can feel the heaviness of my own body...

But its getting so hard to just stand up and do at least 2 km jog... T___T

ah... Wat to do? WAT TO DO???
I must begin the Starvation Strike~!!!

And Vibration Test was a total Screwed Up A$$ O ness... garghhh...

Betrayed

2011-11-12T22:48:00.001+08:00

Boy : I almost betrayed you today

Gal : why? what you did? *thousands of images flipped through her mind*

Boy : I asked a girl out to watch movie with me..

Gal : *quiet*

Boy : Then at the ticket counter I realized I can't do this with other gal beside you.. so I said to her I had an emergency and left... I Love you..

Gal : *quietly shed tears*

What you did, even though seemed so cheesy, but it meant a lot to me..
you're probably the first guy in the world who ever think that watching movie with other gal beside your gf is a betrayal, but that just showed how deep your feelings are for me..

I love you..

A Celebration

2011-11-11T21:08:00.001+08:00

People make such a ruckus about today... Yang paling tak boleh blah tu si mat saleh dah buat muvie plak that the world is going to end on 11.11.11. Its just a nice series of numbers la.. That's all..

Setakat nombor 1 tu... nombor rumah aku pun 1-1-1... ada aku kisah? Takde plak dalam rumah aku tu wujud pintu ke neraka.... (nauzubillahi min zalik)

amende la sangat si mat saleh skarang kan? kita pun yo yo oh je melopong dengan theory kiamat diorang tuh...

haihhzz..

on a totally different note,
Congratulations to people who tied knot in marriage world today... Have a wonderful and prosperous life with your soulmates... may God bless you all...

*quietly waiting for my day to come*

hahaha... sapa tanak kawen kan?

Tricked

2011-11-08T22:43:00.000+08:00

Boy : My hand is paining la sayang... :(

Girl : Really? *hold his hand and massage*

After 2 minutes

Girl : How You Feeling now? *still massaging*

Boy : Actually kan sayang... its the other hand yang sakit..

Mohamad Neezam......... I will never forget this...

Glitter vs Gauche

2011-11-08T15:25:00.000+08:00

Celebrate Eidul Adha with family members at Penang somehow brought back the long lost happiness in me..
Thanks nani, cinnama-s, mamu-s, mami-s, cuzins and all the handsome friends of cuzins (hehex) and Nurul Islam Club of "Penangnites Mamak Families" for an awesome celebration of Hari Raya Korban...

_gambaq2 family tak sempat nak blutoot la plak_ ah...stressssss

Thank You all..

Dah happy2 kat Penang, balik UTP je dah start jadi mcm2...

Bole je makcik Shiqs ni letak Buku Manufacturing (pinjam kat Library plak tuh), tuala pink ngan beg DUIT kat atas bumbung keta time nak gerak balik hostel from cafe.. keta jalan, confirm la barang2 tu suma jatuh~!!!

AAAAAA... MR. BEAN betoi~!!

Kesian laki aku ngan kawan2 dia kena join search party aku tengah2 malam kat UTP ni.........

Dipendekkan cerita, thanks to a very nice UTP-ian, MR. Aaron who found my belongings and reported to the security office... kalau i jumpa u kat mana2 i mesti belanja u minum teh tarik... thousands of thanksssss............

and you sayang... take care of your injured hand..
I love you..

Rumble

2011-11-01T19:07:00.001+08:00

Not that I'm looking forward to go back "home" for holidays or anything... but deep inside, I REALLY don't feel like celebrating anything at this moment.. Not with "family", nor alone..

I am much more happier in this place..
(Except for the fact that I cannot see you everyday, everything else is fine)

Motip membebel ni sebenarnya nak kuatkan hati sebab cuti mid-sem aku tanak balik... haihhzz.

Tests and Projects...
come on laaaaahhh.. Projects tu yang paling membengangkan sekarang nih~!
I have NO idea where to begin.. AH_STRESS SU~!!!

If there's anything that can cheer me up, its these fellas...
<3 I LOVE JONG KOOK <3

As Long As...........

2011-10-31T22:14:00.004+08:00

Although our plan didn't quite worked out,
I am still happy for I get to spend my whole day with you..

You, Me aur Love..
Pyar kaise karna, koyi tumse sikhe...
I love you so much..
Take good care of yourself when I'm not around,
we Will make our own bright future together..

Bosan tunggu dia interview...

not bad, huh?

gaya mcm driver.... GAYA saja...

Encik Mohamad Neezam yang ~~slalu buat muka pelik bila snap pictures~~ chumel... hikhik..
(I miss you already)

you

2011-10-28T03:38:00.000+08:00

Every song in my playlist is about us...

Every hero in any movie seems to look like you..

I'm so in love... =)

we fight, we hug

2011-10-26T16:58:00.002+08:00

we fight....
You shout...
You hang up the phone..
I cry and throw my phone on the bed...

Then you call me back..

(usually it takes 6 missed calls before I pick up the phone again)

I answer with the -after-cry- voice..

You say , "I 'm sorry baby"..

I kept quiet..

You say "I love you, sweetheart"..

I kept quiet...

Then you say, "I'll die if you don't talk to me, honey"..

I say, "shut up, coconut~!"..

You laugh cause you know I Love You too ..

I miss the make up hugs

But I miss you the most..

Handle with Care

2011-10-25T21:42:00.003+08:00

I am such a baby~!

I get sick almost every day.

Grow Up Shiqs~!

You were not this weak..

What Happened to you??

and you always make me sad... why???????

Randoms

2011-10-25T14:21:00.003+08:00

The best thing to love.

yes but no

2011-10-22T19:29:00.004+08:00

yes,

I miss you..

But no,

I don't know any other way to Love you.

祝你生日快乐

2011-10-17T11:15:00.002+08:00

hehehe... special dedication post to a special friend of mine who has just turn 22..

For warming the cold heart of mine,

For all the smiles you put on my face,

For all the laughter we shared,

For all the little tears we shed,

For all the hugs you give me,

For all the comfort you wrap me,

For all the wisdom you impart on me,

For all the thoughts you awe me,

For all the little things that you said,

For all the confidence you build,

For all the beautiful memories you give,

For all the love we live...

I will cherish you forever,

As you are my sifu,

my friend and a sister.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PIKACHU~!!

Have a wonderful year ahead full of laughter and happiness,

Allah Bless...

Muaahhxx...

waaaaaaat

2011-10-11T16:25:00.003+08:00

*blink*

3 weeks in UTP and I have workloads the weight of a giraffe on my head...

ah, bullocks~!

Flying Kisses

2011-10-11T15:00:00.005+08:00

Last night i was on the edge of breaking down...

ma,

I miss you... freaking damn much..

Last night I actually dialed your number in the numbness of thought that I would actually get to hear your voice once again...

Its sad.. I know... But I just miss you..

I hope you're doing awesome in heaven...

If its possible, come and visit me once in a while okay?

If i feel the softness of breeze grazing my cheek,

I'll take that as your soft hand calming me..

I'm going thru some really hard times right now..

If you were here,

you would probably make me my favo teh tarik and tell me to just take a chill pill... :P

You know what, ma?

That's exactly what I'm going to do..

though the teh tarik is now my uneven mixture of nescafe tarik.. (:D)

But I aint givin up..

I'm gona get this scroll... and i'm gona make you proud~!

Okay?

Muahhxx...

I miss you...

note

2011-10-10T23:52:00.003+08:00

everything seems so blurry and gray...

I'm feeling like an empty can that people see on the pathway and have a kick at it to settle their burning fury of the unsatisfied life...

anyways,

I'm just glad I can help..

Even on that tiniest bit of a moment of relieve you felt when u see this crumpled lifeless can that u kicked end up in the trash where it deserves to be...

Life is such a fucked up bitch up to this point..

and I'm living it like a freaking twig!

AWESOME~!

Falling

2011-10-09T21:34:00.004+08:00

Here I am, sitting in my pajamas scratching my head trying to recall the lectures from last week..

( this chair I'm sitting on is giving me a hell of a back pain... Damn it..)

Just when i thought I am all set to do some revision, my mind starts to wonder..

It has been 2 whole weeks I'm out from the house..

You don;t even have even a tiny bit of curiosity of how am I doing?

Really? Not even a message?

You used to get all worried if I din call and update you once every 2 days...

So i guess when you said I'm dead to you, you really meant it...

Anyways...

No matter how badly u treated me,

I can't help but to hold on to the tiny portion in my heart that says you still love me..

I miss you... The Old Fun, Loving you...

I really do.

May Allah Bless you with your new family..

Take Care.

lepak

2011-10-05T18:08:00.002+08:00

~CHILLAX~

S.O.L.O

PEACE
:D

breeze

2011-10-04T15:33:00.003+08:00

Its raining today... :)

and the wind is blowing chill air into the room..

(tip toe-ing in my mini skirt) *weeeeeee*

hehe...

this kind of weather somehow lifts up my ~~skirt~~ spirit... haha

Terasa nak study energy conversion plak... eceyywahhh shiqs... *pats her shoulder*

kenapa minggu ni tak rindu ah?

hmmmmmm.....

PMS

2011-10-02T16:59:00.001+08:00

This is the time of the month that girls despise to the core of their heart and boys with the ultimate amount of confusion and the half-sense to tolerate the emotional roller coaster of their girlfriends for few days until the dreaded period stops and the storm calms back to the usual romantic smiles.

Yesterday night..

Shiqs : Why are you ignoring me??????~!!!!! You x sayang i dah eh? bla..bla..bla...

N : Ah, mampus dah aku... sayang period eh?

Shiqs : mmm...

N : Abis la.. Shiqs da period... Mood swing starts.......now. I'm dead.

hehehe...

You know me too well to bear even the stupidest moment of my monthly ridiculous emotions...
I love you~

creativity :P

2011-10-01T16:01:00.001+08:00

cantik la jugak kan..

ada satu je lagi kurang..

nanti ada masa nak siapkan tu jugak...

hmmm...

rindu..

Inspirations

2011-09-29T21:06:00.001+08:00

satu hari...

InsyaAllah...

akan tercapai semua hasrat hati ni..

skyline.. (untuk yang tersayang)

mini cooper... (untuk aku sayang)

travel g Rome.. (untuk sayang menyayang)

Honeymoon kat Venice... (sengih)

Shopping kat Paris...

Dah mula rindu..

2011-09-27T20:15:00.001+08:00

Back in UTP..
Far away from all the drama..
The silent treatment (5 months of silence after 22 years living with your once loving father )
tak drama lagi? balik blajar pun tak tanya pape.... (sedih laaa... tapi biarla beliau bahagia)

skarang ni tengah tunggu duit gaji pizza aku ni tak masuk2 lagi... mcm mana nak bajet beli buku nie... bukan singgit dua sebijik buku... aduihh... sakit kapla...

Nevermind about that now.. study seems fun.. (although expecting the headache of coping with 5 subjects in 4 months)

I miss you Mohamad Neezam.. A lot.. I never thought I would say this... But I do.. Distance do make the heart grows fonder... I can feel that you do too..
Thank you for staying with me through thick and thin of my "hindi serial drama" life..
Take care sayang.. be safe.. be good... I'll be back in December..
I'll study hard.. I'll study smart... (takleh buat pape la kan... dah promise to you hari tu... =P)

Rindu MIYUN jugak... Sangat3.... Tunggu kak tikin balik... hehe...
To my sister... semoga dapat 5A dan berjaya tinggal kat hostel HSBM... hang pun dah banyak kena buli kat rumah tu kan... It's time you start drawing your future with your hand.. Don't end up like me... Be strong my lil sis.. I love you dearly.. Muaahhhxxx...

gaya

2011-08-22T21:28:00.003+08:00

i wana get a new haircut.. macam tuh *pointing at the hot chick pic above*

nak jugak.. tunggu gaji masuk la...

nasib baik aku sayang..

2011-08-20T18:12:00.003+08:00

al- kisah la kan bulan posa ni........

Ntah apasal ntah sejak dua tiga menjak ni aku dah macam jadi lemah semangat bab2 hantu menantu ni.. padahal masa kat PLKN dulu.. ha... aku ni la manusia paling berannnn kat dalam dorm aku tuh.. *ceeewahhh* ..

tapi betul laaaaa...

tapi tu bukan cita yang aku nak bagitau..

cita dia macam ni ha...

semalam.... serangan migrain (sakit kepala macam nak tercabut otak) so mintak la Encik Mohamad Neezam hantar aku balik umah awal lepas bukak posa..

dah balik makan ubat, tido dalam 4 jam macam tu terjaga.. call la kekasih hati ni cakap sakit dah baik...

sembang punya sembang... sedar sedar dah pukul 3.30 pagi.. aku pun cakap la nak g minum..

ntah mana datang mood menyakat Encik Mohamad Neezam ni... dia start buat aku takut..

N : just imagine ah sayang.... you wake up to go drink... suddenly u hear whispering "kakaaaaaaaakkkkkk" *dengan suara paling seram penah aku dengar*

ShiQs : oiiiiiiii... Don't scare me laaaaaaaaa.... * dah mula seram sejuk*

lepas gado2 sikit aku pun berani kan la bangun nak g minum air...

bukak pintu........

sekaki langkah keluar bilik aku dengar ... "kakaaaaaaakk"

BERDERAU DARAH MCAM NAIK ROLLER COASTER TERGANTUNG...

buat sepuluh saat aku terpaku ja kat dekat pintu bilik aku cuba tak nak pandang belakang...

sekali adik pompuan aku bunyi lagi... "apa kakak buat??"

baru rasa nyawa masuk badan balik... rupanya adik aku yang punya suara...

kalau tak sebab sayang Encik Mohamad Neezam ni... dah lama aku letak anak tikus gila dalam seluar dia... GERAMMMMMMMMMM...

saat terjaga dari tidur...

2011-08-19T19:32:00.002+08:00

oh.. last few blog posts were damn emo... sorry peeps.. somedays are just like that...

anyway..

its time for a wake up call..

tears are overrated... they weaken you..

and i need to be tough.... Tee Yiu Eff Eff... TOUGH...

One day ill rise to the sky...

I'll show to you people who looked down at me, who say stuffs to me...

I'll show you all who the real F****** Biatch i am.

I believe Allah is with me no matter how ignorant i am... Because He knows me...

I believe whatever i did is because the road was shown to me by Him.

I believe all the good people in my life now are sent by Him too..

Especially you. You know who you are.

He did not sent you to me once.. He sent you to me TWICE.

Both times were when I was fully broken down to earth.

you pick me up and hold me tight and tell me everything is going to be fine.

Both times are in the face of love. Me for you.. and You for me.

Past is past...

Present is real because I am living my moments with you...

Future is going to be awesome... because I believe I will have you..

mcm bangang

2011-08-13T20:27:00.003+08:00

Sebenarnya makin hari makin rasa menyampah dengan hidup pun ada gak..

bayangkan...

korang hidup 22 tahun.. satu hari korang bangun tido dan memandangkan hari tu cuti takde benda nak buat so korang pun hilang dalam khayalan.....

"sepanjang aku hidup, amende la sangat aku dah buat?" ........................

"orang lain pakai keta, dah ada umah, aku apa ada?"

"bila la nak abis study ni?"

"agak2 mampu ke aku nak hidup sendiri tak bergantung LANGSUNG kat orang lain"

"apasal la tak leh hidup dengan cara yang aku nak? hidup aku la.. bukan hidup kau.."

"keja macam haram, gaji sikit je...."

"bila bank nak ada duit lebih ah?"

"apasal la jadi tunggang langgang macam ni hidup aku?"

"yang mak ni pun satu... hidup la lama sikit... Tuhan tu kan banyak kesayangan-Nya kat sana... sorang kat bawah ni lama sikit takpa kan... kesayangan saya sorang je pun.. ganti baru LANGSUNG TAK SAMA"

malas la nak layan.. lepas fikir2... serabut2.. tido balik.. bukannya leh makan walaupun stress.. posa la weyh...

sorang sorang..

2011-08-09T19:13:00.003+08:00

Bila dah kena blajar hidup sendiri... jaga diri sendiri... bela nasib sendiri.. baru kita tahu dunia tu sangat besar.

Nak hidup sorang ingat senang?

Kalau kaya tak pe gak..

Dalam akaun bank tuh habuk pun tak pandang.. jauh skali nak masuk..

Nasib baik la aku ni Petronas Scholar.. ALhamdulillah.. lepas la duit makan..

Nasib baik jugak muka aku ni muka rezeki.. senang dapat keja part time.. lepas la duit top up.. hehe

peringatan buat diri sendiri..

Takde sapa yang akan bela nasib diri melainkan diri kita sendiri..

Jangan lepas kena tendang mcam bola, kena fitnah macam2 baru nak sedar diri ye..

Dunia ni sfera..

tak selalu kita di atas... tak slalu kita di bawah...

jadi selalu2 la berdiri atas kaki sendiri..

Tolong jangan harap kat orang ye, Shiqs..

doing nothing is so bloody tiring

2011-06-12T16:00:00.004+08:00

yeah, like i said... it's not easy NOT to do anything.

when you have such build up energy to do a lot of stuffs, but you can't even go out and hang with your friends, (because then a lot of crappy messages will be received such as "why are you such a whore?" "are you even my daughter?" "are you pregnant?" ) you end up snapping crazy pictures of yourself...

MA, if you are watching and listening to all this crap your husband is accusing me of, can u please tell him to stop...

I had enough..

return from the afterlife

2011-05-30T13:28:00.005+08:00

muahahahaha... the wacky wackjob is in da house y'all..

ya, shiqs is back..
not to worry peeps... I'm just here to do some housekeeping on this old blog (*sweeps*) and then i'l be gone until the blogging mood comes up again with the twilight and the shine of new moon. *giggles*

ok.. not funny... *rolls eyes*

neways.. life AT HOME is a bitch. and i'm hangin on pretty well..

Oh... the dramas, the lies, the backstabbing, the harsh words, the painful silence, the rolling of an old man's testicles into his "new" old wife's purse... the hatred, the humiliation.. the acting and the smiley faces when people are around... well, its pretty much overwhelming..

but work is fun.. THANK GOD for that.
and THANK GOD for you...
I love You.
Thank you for holding my hand and guide my way through this hard time.
Thank you for always lending me your shoulder.
Thank you for always loving this unstable wracked emo gal.
Thank you for always being there for me.

I love you. I do.

hello, world.

2011-03-25T20:37:00.000+08:00

mehndi

2010-12-02T02:22:00.003+08:00

people draw henna

on their hand

bearing the name of their beloved

my beloved drew henna

on my hand

with love

~ececeh... melebih plak makcik shiQs ni~

walaupun henna stencil,

terasa kasih mu di situ..

ab to forever

2010-11-28T02:19:00.000+08:00

study mandarin with this song... haha.. (dedicate to fika my sifu... her favourite song)

~ last paper this morning~

Tuesday faster come.

Rumble

2010-11-27T03:28:00.005+08:00

Exams ~!!!!

I just wana get done with it

MSO is killing me...

I love studying.. But, I hate the rumble. Freaking hate it to the core~!

The only motivation is you.

can't wait for Tuesday~

Hold me close

2010-11-26T04:11:00.002+08:00

I've known you for a long time..

But now,

I'm starting to feel you..

You made my heart beats so fast,

I almost believed I might die..

I'm happy, though.

Thank you

sayang~

2010-11-23T03:22:00.002+08:00

What do I see in you?

Tak tahu sayang.

But you are always there for me.

You're lovingly caring.

You're adorable.

You make me laugh for hours.

Your passion in life makes me wanna live mine truly.

Your words of wisdoms amaze me every single time.

You have the most positive thoughts about almost everything.

You never complaint.

You're the reason I'm on my way to the ultimate level of hotness. (=D)

You say you love me EVERYDAY.

You never fail to make me miss you.

You "give" me your luck instead of wishing me "good luck".

You're the only person who sing without hesitation whenever I ask you to.

You look like Marshall (HIMYM) =)

You scold in the most scariest voice.

You sweet-talk me out of my sulkiness in the most loving way possible.

You're ALWAYS there.

~I still duno what I see in you.~

Bunch of Love

2010-11-22T00:49:00.005+08:00

Monkey Misses You More than I Do..

But I love you more than he does..

rindu

2010-11-21T15:27:00.003+08:00

You have no idea how much I'm missing you, ma

How lonely I feel now

I miss hearing your voice over the phone

Plus in times of all this exam ruckus,

I miss your pep talk

I miss how you used to hear all my rants for hours

I'm scared, ma..

You're closer to Mr.God now..

Ask Him to give me strength, please..

~I love you~

~I miss you, a lot~

tell these to my brain

2010-11-20T19:14:00.000+08:00

you are NOT fat

you are NOT sick

you are a very CLEVER girl who is going to finish up studying

6 more freaking long chapters in 1 day

you are AWESOME!!

Avenge

2010-11-20T03:44:00.003+08:00

dah tak tau nak buat apa lagi dah..

study tak abis2

I'm starting to hate you.

I love that I'm hating you.

Because you hurt me so bad,

I'm amazed I haven't done anything to hurt you back.

One day I will.

I promise you that.

Letter

2010-11-19T18:53:00.002+08:00

Dear
my Knight In Shining Armour,

wherever or whoever you are..
I'm waiting..
still..
For that one moment..
That We will share together..
Under the Moonlight..
With the entire Universe bearing witness..
Of our vows..
which will make me believe..
that me too..
have found
My Happy Ending.

Love,
~ShiQs~

doodly ho

2010-11-18T23:28:00.004+08:00

~pikahimpit~

hehe..

~tenten made my day~ =D

study ho?

2010-11-18T17:17:00.002+08:00

study punya study

kertas kat depan makin belambak

lecture notes tak nampak berkurang pun...

=.=""

~bila dah bosan mengadap buku~

memang besar rupanya kepala makhluk ni..

pemangkin ShiQs untuk Study!!

.....hehehehe....

*drool*

kenapa Encik Salman Khan Pemangkin ShiQs untuk Study?

kalau nak tahu...

Ini la Sebabnya..

Stadi sebab nak pandai

bila pandai

dapat keja elok

gaji banyak

bila gaji banyak

bole g dinner ngan SALLU

haha..

p stadi la makcik!

merapu ja.

Salam AidilAdha~

2010-11-17T11:34:00.007+08:00

SELAMAT HARI RAYA

~AIDILaDHA~

First time in my 21 years, I am celebrating Eidul-Adha with my friends in Uni..

It was simple, lovely and sweetadorably perrrrfect...

(suka buat vocab sendiri kan ShiQs ni? ignore pls...)

so anyway, waking up this morning was a bit hard,

but I guess its the blessing of this special day,

Satan got fired up its ***

and I woke up just in time to get ready before the Eid Prayer.

(walaupun terpaksa menanggung malu berlari seperti makcik di khalayak ramai sebab Imam dah nak masuk rakaat terakhir but we were still half-way to the mosque)

*****

Anywhooo..

sayang korang korang~~

(i think i'm growing up to look exactly like my mum)

rindu~~

~linda~

~nisa~

~bash~

~ten ten~

~lovely pikachu~

LAP YIU OLZ...

Thank you for the memorable Eid..

~bila cinta didusta~

2010-11-17T03:10:00.000+08:00

~mengapa menyinta andainya tak setia?~

~tak usahlah bercinta jika hanya berpura~

~bila hati dah jemu~

~mula la berpaling tadah~

... terasa menusuk kalbu weyh ...

green

2010-11-17T00:26:00.002+08:00

pic taken from http://colormekatie.blogspot.com/ ...

My dad was thinking of changing the bathroom tiles..

Definitely not gona show him this pic..

haha..

aku tanak rasa mcm aku mandi kat taman di hadapan orang ramai... *dush*

Dirty Little Secret

2010-11-16T16:45:00.002+08:00

I have been craving to watch a real nice HORROR/THRILLER movie for so long now

(dan akibat mengidam tak dapat)

I've been having super freaky dreams :

Saturday Night

I dreamt I was in a house fill with murderers and few hot babes

(there were rather confusing events occured during the spy sessions in the dream ... baik aku takyah cakap kat sini... nanti ada plak spekulasi terhadap diriku yang innocent ini)

Sunday Night

*blushing* I dreamt that Salman Khan proposed to me... hahahahhaaha...

(okaaaayyy... the story pls.... )

so yea, there were a few murder attempts on me involving women snipers and gay pirates because well, lets face it... THE MOST HOTTEST GUY IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD PROPOSED TO ME.... (imagine i say this in a very slow mo style)

confirm ah kepala aku disenaraikan dalam list "kepala termahal yang perlu dipancung"

Last night

there was this psycho dude who loves to chop people's body with Axe and blades and I was "assigned" ( Shiqs is a CSI now... weeyh... its MY dream) to catch him.. (who BTW also is a very HOT dude with SIX PACKS and has this Arjun Rampal's look)

this dream punya ending tak best..

apparently he has an "apprentice" who also does the dirty psychotic job and I was duped and in the end I was the one being chopped

(aku terbangun sambil menjerit mcm orang gila and thank god my rummie wasn't in the room at that time)

hehe.. saja nak letak gamba ni..

sexy kan.. (chuuuuuu)

so anyway, hopefully tonight I would have some pleasant dreams mcm g melancong kat Eropah ke, aku ada body cam Aishwarya Rai ke, dapat shopping kat Paris tanpa kredit limit... dan mimpi yang sewaktu dengan nya...

Tolong la jangan mimpi yang bukan2 lagi...

Penat.!

Bangun je headache~~~!!

i find strength in you

2010-11-10T19:16:00.001+08:00

Its true what people say :

You want to know who loves you the most?
Those are the people who stood by your side, in times of sorrow and pain, without fail trying and trying to make you feel better, with every little gesture.

I had one of my worst fever yesterday, couldn't stand up properly, walking is a pain, spinning headache, dry cough, sore throat, flu, unstable body temperature and what not.

and today......
almost every single pain has gone... (just a remaining once in while cough and a lil hangover feeling from all the cough syrup shots... )

Thank you Fika for always be so caring and for your outstanding ability to make me forget my pain and laugh instead.

Thank you Neezam for calling every 4 hours to make sure i take my medicine and for all those lovely words... (sangat terharu)

Thank you Ciput my roommate for the meds... (sorry i finished your sough syrup)

Thank you housemates for buying me food.

Thank you Maher Zain for all the superb songs that never fails to keep me company..

I find strength in all these amazing characters around me... Love y'all...

I read my Diary

2010-11-07T23:22:00.000+08:00

No, I din cilok Tino Coury's single and mencetak rompak kan nya..

I just read my diary...

Went back home last thursday,

sampai rumah I saw my brother rearranging some old heavy giant boxes. Written on the front side of one of the box with red marker was this -------->

"SAMPAH ANAK AKU" ( my mother's cute handwriting)

haha.

I recognized at once that the box contained all my High School junks.

Memory time.

My GAWDDDD...

I just laughed my ass off going through every page of my old diary.

Terselit di dalamnya ada lah beberapa kepingan gambar kelas, gambar ponteng kelas, debates notes, (most of them belongs to uvana... aku pun tatau how they got in there... if u reading this dun ask me). oh, and few letters... heheee...

Teenagers can be such a drama queen.. (esp moi)

AA--SAM

2010-10-30T20:58:00.003+08:00

last night Music Pursuit was AA---SAM (quoting from one of the MC)

Congratz to Tan Foo Piew for an AA--SAM performance!!

You deserve the trophy dude!

The theory of guys look freaking HOT with guitar in their hands is UNDENIABLY TRUE!!

Any guy, for that matters, (kalau muka cam roti canai terbalik pun la kan) when you hold a guitar, You ARE the MAN! I think the God and Goddess of Music plays this dirty tricks on girls just for fun kot.

you know, so the not-so-good-looking-fella can get laid once in a while.. (okay shiqs, nuff said)

hey, this theory doesn't apply for Foo Piew k? Dia memang HENSEM. dot.

********

hehe..

I din know I'm chooo cute...

Once a Rockstar

ALWAYS

A ROCKSTAR

RAWWWWWrrrr

(pardon the perasan-ness)

When Hell Break Loose

2010-10-27T18:48:00.009+08:00

I go mad!

Its as IF I don't have enough issues to handle on my own..

ada je masalah nak menimpa aku yang cumel ni..

syok sendiri

(ignore please)

Let's not rant about that here for I have no mood whatsoever to repeat the story again for the hundred-th times.

Nor do I want to stuff anymore Pringles or Rocky or Tim Tams into my already fat body and make it hundred times fatter..

sekian terima kasih..

anywhooooo...

I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT MY SHOPAHOLIC-NESS!!

in two days I have spent almost 200rm!!

(Hello, makcik! kau tu tinggal kat HUTAN TRONOH je tau???)

itu la pasal.. setakat kat Taman Maju tu je kau bole membeli belah mcm kat Times Square..

kalau kau tinggal kat KAY ELLL.. mampos ah...

my Dad would have to start planting Money Trees...

****

Coming back from Pasar Malam was fun tonight...

Shiqs : Oh, Tak bawak Matrix Card

Nisa : A'ah... mcm mana ni weyhhh??

Ija : takpe, aku buat aksi melampau depan pak guard nanti..

Fika : *sibuk balas sms* (tak masuk campur)

Nina : (Adjust radio)

Depan Pintu Masuk

Shiqs : *buat buat tido*

Nisa : *pandang tasik*

Fika : *masih balas sms*

Nina: *laughing* (on the earlier jokes which I've no idea wat)

Ija : *turunkan cermin kereta* ASSALAMUALAIKUM PAKCIKKKKKK!!!!!!!!! *waving waving*

Pakcik Guard : O.o''

Terbaik ah Ija.. !! Gila mantap distraction kau!!

A1..

ENGINEERED.

The Road Must Taken

2010-10-21T15:16:00.004+08:00

I have been soooo unproductive..

Its not that I am a lazy pig or anything

(well, sometimes la... tapi tu only when study-related je taww)

(~.~)"

So anyway... I've been thinking la kan... since starting December I'll be doing my internship (dekat rumah that is) I'll be having MONEY!!!!

MONEY!!!!!

MY OXYGEN that allows me to BREATHE...

MY GREEN FRIEND that makes me HAPPY!!!!!!

MY LOVE whom when departs, leave me crying for daysssssssss....

(maybe weeks, depends on how much I spend... )

================ nak shopppingggggg===================

( *slaps slaps* sedaq diri tu shiqs... hang tengah pokai)

T__________________T

tolong kembali ke dunia nyata, makcik shiqs. *bubbles popped*

haa... so... as I was saying...

I have been doing some maths... and by the second month.... of coz la plus the PET allowance... (IFFFFFF.... me yang rajin bangat ni mampu buat part time job in JUSCO which BTW pays moreeeeeeee than the company ill be doing my intern for 8 bloody months do.... )

I'll be able to buy theeeeeeeeseeeeeeee babiessssss... ::::::

Sony Ericsson Aino

current price : RM810

so I'm assuming by the time I get my hand on this baby, the price will go down to at leaaaaast RM 780

Y not I-phone?

(setakat nak dengar radio je pakai I-phone... apa kes kan?)

naahhh... ME always Sony Chick la... camera dia 8.1 MP kot..

~~kui kui~~

takyah aku bazir duit lagi beli digi cam ...

touch screen lagi... (double likessss)

*breatheeeeeeeeeeeeee*

LOOK AT THE GORGEOUS SAREEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

50 USD onlyyyy...

*faints*

tak kiraaaa...

IM BUYING ONE

if i din get this exact same design and colour..............

kill me..

just put a gun on my forehead... and

tembak!

thats it.

and NOWWW (ow ow ow ow)

for the GRAND FINALE.... ( e e e e e )

-the thing in the kurungan is echo BTW-

~muahahahahhahaha~

OH, YEAAAA....

tak pecaya?????????

bagus... jangan pecaya...

CAR LICENSE kena amik dulu la kan...

and thennnnnn...

well, whatever car my dad is getting me ill be more than happy to drive it till it R.I.P

theeeeennnn...

MY FIRST OFFICIAL CAR WOULD BE

NISSAN SKYLINE GTR V-SPEC

check me out bitches...

I'll be riding this hotty for life.

ENGINEERED.

it's Our Bridge of Love

2010-10-19T00:28:00.003+08:00

I was packing my bag this morning (with my brother honking every 5 mins shouting "cepatla makcik!! hang nak balik UTP tak mau???)

then the weirdest thing happened; --- I saw a super nice peach coloured blouse hanged inside my closet. below that lied 3 pieces of 50 cents coins. ( since mum passed away, I have opened and closed the closet hundreds of times, and yet I never saw the gorgeous blouse till this morning)

I once told her that I'll be doing a lot of presentation this semester, and I wanted her to go shopping with me and buy me some nice blouses because lets face it, my taste in outfit sucks big time.

well as for the 50 cents coins, she knew I need them to do my laundry...

I'm glad you knew I still need you, ma..

I love you. Rest In Peace. ~~

for what is worth

2010-10-11T14:58:00.003+08:00

some people, who claim themselves to be as matured as they look, still have the IQ of a five-year old.

GROW UP!!

Look at the Finger, absorb the Signal then Be Gone

2010-10-07T00:05:00.005+08:00

Its obvious you don't know me well..

cos if you do,

you won't even remotely be wanting to do what you did or say what you said,

Two can play this game.

and Oh...

I don't break the rules,

I create 'em.

Awesome Weekend (part 1)

2010-10-05T13:31:00.007+08:00

Last weekend was a lil crazily spent.

Thursday evening

Put on me leather jacket, hopped into Kj's car, dumped the two giant bag packs on his back

seat, shouted KAYYYYYYYYYY ELLLLL... and off we went.

Pit stopped at Tapah's R&R..

This is the only R&R after Bukit Gantang's that I walked out without complaining about the washroom or the food. (thumb's up)

ShiQs : why is everyone keep staring at me?

Pika : err... sebab ko nampak mcm "minah rempit" with that jacket on.... (being completely honest)

Kj : *silent*

ShiQs : Do I? *looks at Kj hoping for a better reply*

Kj : something's missing.... mana helmet ko? *giggles*

ShiQs : =.=""

Roooaarrr..

Sunway Pyramid.

Finally me met uvana the baldy... hehe.. we walked around this place till 2 am.

Honestly, KL freaks me out.

First, I don't think I would be able to enjoy any mamak food here without getting diarrhea.

Second, I don't belong here. I'm too IN-NO-CENT... (=P)

We spent the whole night gossiping about ex-high school mates,hot dude and dudettes, watched HIMYM, giggled for few hours and then zzzzzzzzz-ed off...

kononnya nak p jogging la kan pakcik uven!!!!!! penat je aku drag that sport shoes all the way from IPOH... *dush dush*

Friday

Morning kicked start with good news... ELAUN DAH MASUK... *hugs hugs Pikachu*

Sorry uvana.. we apologize big time for disturbing your 6 hours princessy beauty sleep.

.....................................Elaun dah masuk.......................................

*suddenly our outfit for the afternoon interview

looks dull and unattractive*

Apa lagi mau tunggu?

STEP IN

AND SHOoooooooooPPPPPIIIIIIINNNNNgggggg

me lurrrve staring the ice skating platform.. especially when someone falls ... hehe..

Interview session went on great although with us three showing up after 1 HOUR. (talk about being fashionably late)

After a long suffering day (did I mentioned I vomited, suffered a Terrible menstrual pain and endured a horrible feet blister? ................. so, yeah... ) me and pika board the 5 pm bus to Malacca... BALIK uMAH PIKACHU!!!

............ to be continued ...............

................penat la taip banyak2...............

You and Me against the VORLD

2010-09-30T17:09:00.003+08:00

*sweeps*

*swooooshhh*

*dusssssttt*

*cockroaches running away* .....

fuiyooo... been a while since I last posted my rants here...

I miss you me pink blog..

I had loads of things to brag about but I just couldn't find the energy to vomit them all out here.

what makes today so encouraging to blog?

UVANAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!! me is going to meet you ( FINALLY, after what seems like centuries)

I hope I pass this Interview.. after so long, I feel like I can finally live my life.

with my bestest friend by my side.... me will be fully in MOTION!

wuhuuuuuuuuuuu.....

lets not jinx it, ya....

*crossing fingers*

GOD, help moi....

Al fatihah

2010-09-13T00:30:00.001+08:00

This post i dedicate to my darling ma whose soul has been blessed n returned to The Almighty on 11/9/2010 at 4.30 pm..
Ma,
you were an inspiration to many peøple,
you hv touched so many souls in so many ways,
you were an awesome mother,
a loving wife,
a darling daughter,
an incredible friend,
a beautiful women, inside out..

Ma,
for 3 years u have been fighting and surviving every single pain and sickness Allah has given you as test upon His beloved..

Even with all the hardships you had to go through, you never drop the sweetest smile on your face..

You never did complaint,
you never sighed,
you never doubted your iman,
you were never scared,
you were ALWAYS warm..

I love you Ma....
Truly.Deeply.Sincerely..
I have no regrets as i have said n done all tht i need to

May Allah bless your soul, makes your resting place an Eden and place you among His beloved..
Ameen......

unravel

2010-08-30T23:55:00.002+08:00

Let's just say, I got tired of the dramas.

Justification is so out rated.

So, lets assume I'm crapping out some facts, aite?

I love you, I do.

I'm not being selfish, I'm being practical.

I'm not in denial, I'm facing the shit that is life.

I'm not ignorance, I'm pretending to not care.

I'm not dead inside, I'm trying to live the life I desire.

I'm not ungrateful, I'm creating my best future from the present "gifts".

I'm not crapping, I'm actually telling the truth.

Tada...

Another successfully blabbed poem.

there's a lil bit more to that smile..

2010-08-27T00:33:00.002+08:00

It is a weird feeling to find yourself stuck in a bucket full of emotions.

One moment you are on the fluffiest cloud nine and all you begged for from God is to let you feel the same way at least for the next hour.

But, then you came to a halt.

It feels like someone grabbed away your cotton candy and replaced it with the smelliest socks you can imagine and whether you like it or not, you gotta pinch your nose and lick it till its all dry.

(Okay.. that's just ... Gross.. Yuck!)

so anyway,

I am feeling very happy for God has given me the most awesome people in the world whom I treasure dearly.. My friends.. For all that is worth in this world, I am so glad I have you people in my life to keep my soul intact in its fragile body. For making me laugh and for making me feel like I deserve a normal life.

On the other hand, from time to time... I feel like I can simply crash down on both of my hands and knees to the ground and just lie there without emotions or feelings. Being so far away from someone you dearly love when she needs you the most at times of hardship and pain, is killing me. Although I know, even when I'm there by her side, she will still NEVER be the same person I knew.

I need to see that motherly smile on her face... once more..

I need to see her laugh until tiny tears fell down her loving eyes... once more...

I need to see her walk to me and pinch my cheek and say "my daughter is soooo naughty!!" ....once more..

I need to feel the warmth of her hugs whenever I want to be comforted.... once more..

I need to be able to talk to her and gossip about EVERYTHING and EVERYONE until we fell asleep on each other's arm.. once more..

I want my mum to be my mum.. once more...

hundred miles..

2010-08-23T21:12:00.000+08:00

When you need me the most to be there by your side,

I am hundred miles away,

When I am supposed to hold your soft hands in mine while whispering words of faith to your ears and tells you stories and laugh with you,

I am hundred miles away,

When you are struggling in pain and you need me to hug you and say "everything's going to be fine",

I am hundred miles away,

ma....

I miss you...

I love you....

Stay strong please..

For me...

For our love..

For us..

??

2010-08-23T01:35:00.002+08:00

I have no Idea whatsoever that is going on..

Something is definitely wrong..

I am feeling very restless..

Not in a good mood...

Crankyness is attacking every 2 minutes or so..

I cant focus in studies..

(keep on repeating every words in the lecture notes but nothing is coming in this already frozen brain)

I am very sure I'm not PMS-ing..

Something is wrong... somewhere..

sauq

2010-08-22T05:52:00.003+08:00

we walked around UTP in the middle of the morning just to have a plate of maggie goreng! oh, my...

(burrrppps)

~satisfied~

~happy stomach~

~zzzzzzzzz~

********************

counting down to THE day...

I miss you like crazy..

waaaaa~

Your happy voice made my day..

XoXo...

Royal Invitation

2010-08-21T15:44:00.003+08:00

~~Royal Mechies Ramadhan Dinner..~~

The place was nice,

People looked gorgeous

( Girls with heels,make-ups, and lovely dresses..

Guys without heels and make-ups.. hehe.. all luked simply fabs )

Food was ookay..

(I missed the grilled beef which they all claimed delish.. T______T )

The gift exchanging game at the end of the dinner was fun!

(I got home with the biggest gift in the room.. Wall clock =D)

Photographers were awesome..

(click click click and more clicks... soo royalty semua orang rasa.. )

The washroom was a bit weirdly designed..

BUT BUT BUT

I LOVE THE HUGE MIRROR ON THE WALL!!

woot woot

A night worth spent i shall say..

(Roomie says : First time I saw you sleeping, kak Shiqs)

I was not able to sleep last two nights.. really needed the long hours sleep..

(I felt like a princess allright... hehe..

except for the hangover feeling when i woke up this morning.. eh.. afternoon)

~~~syok sendiri~~~

You missed a spot.

2010-08-20T05:15:00.002+08:00

I go nuts when it comes to cleanliness.

I'm not a super massive clean freak like MO...

But, I go -in a normal amount of freakness- crazy if the heart of the house looks like a hijacked pirate ship.

haihhz..

and to top everything up, the Stupid refrigerator is NOT working

(the bacterias are having a partaaaaaaaaayyyyy inside the perfectly first class heaven )

erghhh!

I wish I have a MO with me!

<<<<<<<<<<<<<

Coldplay~ Fix you

2010-08-20T00:40:00.004+08:00

I stumble upon this song..

and as usual,

story of my life replayed over and over again before my eyes..

so here Shiqs : I dedicate this song to me...

(haihhzz.. super lame la ini budak)

When you try your best but you don't succeed

When you get what you want but not what you need

When you feel so tired but you can't sleep

Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

When you love someone but it goes to waste

Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below

When you're too in love to let it go

But if you never try you'll never know

Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face

When you lose something you cannot replace

Tears stream down your face

And I

Tears stream down your face

I promise you I will learn from my mistakes

Tears stream down your face

And I

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

empty jar

2010-08-19T22:23:00.001+08:00

I think humans all around the world are praying for the same thing to God ..

Happiness

when it comes to my turn, the charm has ran out..

Even begging doesn't help..

why is it that losing faith is waayyyy more easier that keeping it? =(

I need strength..

Silver Lining

2010-08-19T04:15:00.007+08:00

I shall recover

with every bit of strength

I find

in betrayal and dishonesty,

One day,

I will find my happiness,

On that day,

you will be a history,

a piece of scratch

from my past,

meaningless, empty and sad.

and

I will walk away,

proud

that I ever love truly,

while

you never embrace any..

~ShiQs~

_mengeteh_

2010-08-19T01:08:00.004+08:00

Mengeteh ...

translated ----------->>>>>>

let's go have a glass of "teh tarik" at mamak after tarawikh!

haha.. OMG! you people (ain, ija, nina, pika) are a bunch of nut cases!

And I love y'all for tat...

finally saw the cute "abang bancuh air".. hehe.. *gediks ah shiqs*

still as cute as ever.. wooot.. woot..

My first Tarawikh was nice... except for the accidental "nap" during the last rukuq..

(Imam tu lama sangat kowtttttttttttt)

Sorry, God.. won't happen again..

**************************************-------------------******************************

~~~ still hoping to be there with you at this time.. but, all I can do is pray for your well being.. I miss you like crazy.. counting down to the day I'll see you again...

XoXo from far..~~~

some gasp.. others simply stare

2010-08-18T15:37:00.004+08:00

PINK!

hahaa..

The old shiqs would just vomit and let out a huge "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" if she had to wear pink let alone change her blog template to her least favourite colour.

Anyhow, embrace the truth folks.. (giggle)

Even my bed sheets and towel are pink today.

And I beginning to love this colour.

(I can see Chira's happy tears) =D

oy, I'm turning into one of those gossip girls.

And all I can say is, Thank You Pika!!!

wakakaa..

This girl has completely flipped me 360 degrees.

Looking forward for our next girls getaway!

Hugs and kisses.

heart you gal

with

all my heart and soul

too little too much

2010-08-13T23:14:00.003+08:00

I have piles of work to do. Lab reports. Revision. Submit resumes for internships. Oh Em Gee.

I tell you.. I am getting lazier by the second.

On a totally different note, I can't thank God enough for sending me angels in the form of friends. I love you peeps. Especially you and you. ~~

My deepest love for both of you for always being there. For painting rainbows in my dull life and for listening to all my craps and stupid problems.

Hugs and kisses.

Don't hate the player, hate the game.

2010-08-11T13:03:00.003+08:00

I hate BOTH the player AND the game!

Seriously, What do you want from me?? (Adam Lambert song suddenly playing at the back of ma head)

I was doing fine.. like really fine.. minding my own business, fucking my OWN life... with great attitude.

Now, all of a sudden, I'm such an Emo lad, crying every time the clock hit 3am, ending up being clueless of MY OWN business every now and then, shit on my attitude, minding YOUR business, giving you the biggest share to Fuck my life.... why is that????????

I want to walk away from this retarded shit!

I hate this game.